Creationism and Coffee

In the beginning God created coffee,

And God tasted the coffee, and it was good.

Thus began the second day…

Okay, perhaps not exactly Biblical in proportion, but a damned necessary evil in my book. I stayed up waaaay past my bed time last night to watch my beloved Ravens lose to their arch-rivals, the Steelers, 23-20 in an overtime nail biter. Now, I am left to pick up the pieces of my shattered dreams and this steaming hot cup of Columbian black gold, my Medellin Mistress, is the only comfort I have. As I ponder the thought of work today on the morning after the night before, I am convinced that God did indeed create coffee. There is no way that the Supreme Being toiled endlessly and creatively for six days without a few cups of joe.

If there was no coffee, the World would have never been created; it’s as simple as that. In fact, Pope Clement VIII officially baptized coffee in the late 1500's in recognition of its divine powers. The centuries that followed this frequently overlooked event have brought us wonderful discoveries and technological advances. The same human race that needed thousands of years to invent the wheel has laid the foundation for all the modern sciences in a matter of a few hundred years. Isaac Newton developed the basis of modern Calculus and the Law of Gravity in the 1660's - exactly around the time coffee became widespread in England - coincidence my friends? I think not!

And so it is back to the arms my Caffeine Countess I go and then on to face the big scary world of Medicaid IT!